You've come a Long way, baby

I'm sick. Not with morning sickness - with the flu.

I am achy and stuffy, but I'm feeling much better than yesterday when I had a fever and was both chilled and sweating profusely at any given moment.

Strangely, I gladly would trade these four days of the flu for four weeks of morning sickness. I haven't consistently had morning sickness since my first few weeks of pregnancy, just a few hits of nausea here and there.

Not that I want to be throwing up all the time - oh, no. I hate throwing up, always have.

But I just don't feel pregnant. Maybe my flu symptoms are overshadowing any pregnancy signs, or maybe I've just gotten used to feeling sore in surprising places so it's not such a surprise anymore.

I guess I'm just anxious to hit the 12-week mark so I can feel completely assured that BL is healthy and everything is fine with my pregnancy. I find myself thinking about BL every second of every day, but without morning sickness sometimes I have to go back to my memory of the tiny beating heart we saw last Friday for proof that this is real.

I'm almost at nine weeks, so we only have another three-and-a-half weeks more of waiting. I say "we" but that's not so accurate - Matt is not someone who obsesses and stresses over something he can't control. If you can't already tell, I am.

I know February 15 will be a happy, happy day for us both.